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Support • 4 min read

Grief in children: how to help them cope

The death of a loved one can be extremely tough on kids. Here are some ways to help children process their loss to ensure they’re grieving properly.

The death of a loved one can be extremely tough on kids. But there are ways to help children process their loss to ensure they’re grieving properly.

When a loved one dies, children show and feel their grief in different ways. It’s important, though, that children feel safe to feel the way they need to feel and to process their emotions. There are, of course, ways you can help your children get through the trauma of losing someone close to them. There are also things you can do to help them along the way.

Talk to them honestly

Most children are aware of death, even if they may not understand it. In fact, many cartoons and kids’ shows actually deal with death in a way that children can relate to. But experiencing grief first-hand can be confusing and very upsetting.

The important thing to remember is that you need to be honest with the kids without volunteering too much information. Speak in age-appropriate terms and be direct. Kids are literal, so if you use euphemisms like ‘mummy is in the clouds now’ or ‘grandpa went to sleep’, they can become quite afraid and also quite upset when mummy doesn’t come back from the clouds or grandpa doesn’t wake up.

Create some mementos for them

Just because a loved one is gone, doesn’t mean they’ll be forgotten. Children relate to physical things, so having something that reminds them of the person they’ve lost can help them manage their emotions. If death is expected, a nice idea may be to write letters to the child that they can open when they get older.

Another way to help them remember is a photobook of the person’s story. Who they were, when they were born, photos of them when they were young and then growing up. Of course, include photos of your child with the relative so there is a visual clue. You can even write memories alongside the photos for your child to read.

When clearing out closets, take a piece of clothing from the lost loved one and create a pillow, a bear or a blanket. This gives your child something physical to hold and a blanket can even help comfort them—like a warm hug.

Show your own grief

Kids model behaviour so if you are sharing your own grief in a healthy way, they know it’s ok to do so too. Don’t hide your emotions from them. Crying alongside your child shows them that it’s ok to express themselves.

At the same time, show your child that it’s ok to smile and laugh. There’s no right or wrong way to grieve and the same goes for your child. They need to know that it’s ok to laugh, even though everyone around them may be sad.

Put protections in place

The death of a loved one, especially a parent, can be very disruptive for a child. A whole piece of their world is now gone and it can cause a lot of emotional trauma. It’s important that these emotions are dealt with, otherwise they can bottle up and cause long-term issues.

The last thing family members want to think about is covering everyday expenses. Putting insurance protections in place, such as Life Insurance, could provide a safety net for the family, so you can focus on your grief and your children can continue to live their lives as normally as possible.

While making plans for the loss of a loved one is difficult to talk about, having the tough conversations now will help make things easier in the long run for your loved ones. Insuranceline is here to make it easier. If you need assistance setting up your Life Insurance plan, contact Insuranceline on 13 77 87 or get an online quote.

 

Important information

Cover under the Funeral Insurance Benefit is for Accidental Death only for the first 12 months of cover, including for any increases. Accidental Death has a special meaning in the PDS and some causes of death are excluded during this time—please refer to the PDS or call us for further details. After the first 12 months, the Funeral Insurance Benefit provides cover for all causes of death.

Backed by TAL

^Offer available to Insuranceline customers who complete an application for an Insuranceline branded and distributed Life Insurance, Income Protection or Funeral Insurance policy between 1 October 2023 and 31 March 2024 (inclusive) and are issued with a policy with a commencement date prior to 00.01AM (AEST) 1st of May 2024. To be eligible policy holders must hold the policy for 4 consecutive months and pay 4 months’ premiums in full. One Gift per customer. View full terms and conditions.

**Bonus 10% more cover is calculated on the fifth anniversary from the Policy Commencement Date. Each adult life insured will have an extra 10% of the average Funeral Insurance Cover amount held during the previous five years added to their Funeral Insurance benefit. Terms and conditions apply. Refer to the PDS for more information.

#Claims paid figures relate to all Insuranceline life insurance policies in the 2021 financial reporting year (1 April2021 to 31 March 2022). All claims on Insuranceline policies are assessed against the relevant policy terms and conditions. These terms and conditions, as well an explanation of the claims process, can be found in the applicable Product Disclosure Statement. Claims are administered and settled by the insurer, TAL Life Limited.

***Insuranceline is the longest standing provider of Funeral Insurance in Australia, based on: Strategic Insight, Actuaries & Researchers. Funeral Insurance means a policy with periodic premium payments that provides a lump sum to help pay for funeral and associated expenses when you die and excludes pre-paid Funeral Plans and Funeral Bonds.

The information provided on this website is general advice only which means it does not take into account your individual needs, objectives or financial situation. For this reason, you should consider whether it is appropriate for you, and before you decide to buy or to continue to hold an insurance product, you must read the relevant Combined Product Disclosure Statement (PDS) and the Financial Services Guide (FSG). The PDS/FSG contains important information which will help you understand the product, including what's covered and what's not covered and to decide whether it is appropriate for you. The Target Market Determination (TMD) for the relevant product, where applicable, is also available.

If you are considering cancelling a policy you already hold in order to replace it with a new policy, make sure you read the terms and conditions of both policies before you make a decision. The cover terms may be different, you may lose benefits accrued under your existing policy, and waiting periods may apply to the new policy. Changes in your personal circumstances (such as your age, health, and employment) that have occurred since your existing policy was originally taken out may also affect your new policy. As your application for a new policy may not be accepted, and some policies may be unable to be reinstated after they have been cancelled, you should consider waiting until your new policy is confirmed before you cancel any existing cover.

Promoted by Insuranceline, a trading name of TAL Direct Pty Limited (of Level 16, 363 George Street, Sydney NSW 2000) ABN 39 084 666 017 AFSL 243260. TAL Life Limited ABN 70 050 109 450 AFSL 237848 issues the life insurance benefits. St Andrew's Insurance (Australia) Pty Ltd ABN 89 075 044 656 AFSL 239649 issues the Involuntary Unemployment Cover.

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